Ray:
I am truly humbled that would share such a personal tragedy with us. My heart hurts because you hurt and because I know what depression will do to a family. Not as deep as what you have experienced, but as Les said the blocking people, etc.
JohnB said he was open to a chat and so am I and I am only +3 hours on the clock. By all means, PM or get with me if there is anything I can do--even if it is just to listen. Probably can't offer any meaningful advise, but I can listen.